It's your 21st birthday

 Caleb,

Today, is your 21st birthday. 

Last night, Caden's girlfriend surprised us with this cookie cake she made at work in your honor. She's such a wonderful addition to the family. You would love her, too. She did a fantastic job on the cake. 

I love that the "pots of gold" are actually beer steins. I imagine we would have celebrated today at a bar and toasted your birthday with a drink. I'll have one tonight after dinner while we watch Toy Story or Cars. I'm leaning towards Toy Story tonight because I keep picturing how cute you were in your Buzz Lightyear costume. When I tried to take a picture of you, you kept stretching your arms out and yelling, "To Infinity & Beyond!"

It's a milestone year. Instead of wondering about all the things that could or would have been, I plan to spend the day remembering the things that defined who you were.

Your handsome smile.

Your infectious laugh.

Your high energy when giving something your full attention.

Your enthusiasm when meeting new people.

The way you were "all about the girls" and admitted it freely with a sly grin.

The way your face lit up when you played with Samson.

The way you looked running down the hallway while racing the anesthesiologist on your way to a radiation treatment. You ran past me, then came back and said, "Hi, Mom!" then took off running again. That goofy look on your face just as the anesthesia started to hit the sweet spot for you. 

The love and affection you showed your brother.

I loved watching you play Wii with Caden. The video of the two of you sword-fighting still makes me laugh. 

Can you believe Caden is a senior in high school this year? I'm still having trouble accepting it. You would be so proud of him. He's had so much adversity the past couple of years and has still turned things around enough that he will get to graduate early. I'm continually amazed at his resilience and believe you had a great part in teaching him that from a very early age. You were such an amazing big brother to him. 

The fun you had on playdates with your half-sister, Stacey. (Can't believe she's 18 already!)

I remember the joy you shared the day you got to meet all of your half-siblings. You didn't know they were your siblings at the time. You just knew they were the kids of "Mommy's friend, Dawn." That instantly made them your friends, too. It's the only picture I have of you with all of your siblings & I cherish it. It became even more special after your brother, Matt, died in March 2017. I just know you greeted him when he entered Heaven.

Today I will celebrate the young man who is 21, but still forever 5. I'll eat some of your favorite foods (fried "swimps" for lunch and pancakes for dinner). I'll watch one of your favorite movies. I'll remember. I'll laugh. I'll tell others about you. I love you, son. Happy birthday. 

You are loved always, in all ways. You are forever in my heart and always on my mind. I love and miss you to infinity and beyond.

Love,

Mom

 

Happy 19th Birthday!

My sweet Caleb. Nineteen years ago at this time, I was eagerly awaiting your birth. We were getting ready to head to the hospital for D. to be induced. I remember it all so very clearly. When you were finally born at 9:21pm, I was so blessed to be in the delivery room. The doctor handed me the scissors to cut your umbilical cord, literally severing the connection between you and D. and joining you to me. When he tried to place you in her arms, she said, "I'm not his mom, she is. Give him to her." Then she pointed at me. I will never be able to thank her enough for making me a mom. Though you were only with us for a very short 5 years, every day was filled with your joy and laughter. You introduced me to a type of love I had never experienced before - the love of a mother. Today, I will celebrate your birth. I will celebrate your life. I will celebrate you. You are greatly loved and greatly missed. Happy 19th birthday in Heaven. I love you to infinity and beyond and always will. #LovedToInfinityAndBeyond  #Calebismyhero 

Loved always in all ways - to infinity and beyond.

Angel and Caden

Happy 18th birthday, Caleb

 Today would have been Caleb’s 18th birthday. I still miss him every single day and wonder what he would be like. What kind of man would he be? Would he be getting ready to start college? Would he want to join the military? Would he have wanted to join a trade? Would he still want to help people and make a difference in the lives of others? 

So many things that could have been. Should have been. But there is one thing that happened that I prayed would happen. I know he loved Jesus with all his heart. I know he is now in the presence of God Almighty. God holds Caleb in His arms. 

We may not know what God’s plan is. I may never know why Caleb was called home so early. However, I do know that if what we went through helped just one person come to know Jesus as their Lord and Savior then it was worth it. That means one more person will join Caleb in Heaven. I can rejoice in that knowledge. 

Today, Caleb celebrates in Heaven. He gets to celebrate every single day. So, although I miss him, I will not wallow in grief. I move forward and live life without him. And to live a life with Jesus so when my time on Earth is done, we can celebrate together.

Until that time comes, I will remember his birthday here. Tonight, Caden and I will celebrate with fried shrimp - Caleb’s favorite. 

Happy birthday, Caleb. 

You are missed and loved to infinity and beyond. 

Love,

Angel and Caden

10 years

 10 years.

520 weeks.

3,653 days.

87,672 hours.

5,260,320 minutes.

Those all represent one thing. That's how long it's been since you took your last breath as I held you in my arms. I will miss you for the rest of my lifetime. And I will remember. I love you, son.

#ALifetimeOfLove #CalebIsMyHero #MissedAndLoved #ToInfinityAndBeyond 

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We still miss Caleb every moment of every day. He is always in our hearts, always in our thoughts, and is loved today, tomorrow, in all ways to infinity and beyond.

Angel & Caden

Happy 15th Birthday, Caleb

My world changed the day I became a mom. Tonight at 9:21 pm marks 15 years since Caleb Michael Huffines took his first breath.

One Year After Melanoma Diagnosis

It's been just over a year since we found out Dad had melanoma. We then waited another month until he had the first PET scan It's been such an up and down year due to it and the other health issues that were discovered during that time. He's been through double pneumonia, three heart cath procedures, infusions every 3 weeks for the melanoma, and a host of rashes and infections.

Back to School Again

This year, back to school posts are a bit harder to handle than ones in the past. I see all the wonderful pics of kids starting high school. I smile a little and I also cry little. I should have a freshman this year. Caleb should be turning 14 in less than a week. I’m in a contemplative mood and wondering about things.